I’ve been up for hours, the kids and wife still in bed. After an unsuccessful search for my flash drive, two cups of coffee, and some pre-writing for a new book, I decide to try taking the dogs for a walk.
It’s cold and wet outside. The wind, I can already tell, is no good for my back. But the three of us trudge on my usual route, too short for any real exercise value, but a start. A something.
I think of my kids still asleep. Are they? Or are they just waiting for someone else to get up and take the order to give the dogs their overdue constitutional? I half expect the whole house, nicely quiet for sometime, to be abuzz when I get back.
But upon return, it is still just me. And after a few minutes, I’m still warming. And wondering. Is this really a new day, the first day of change, better beginnings? Or just another cold day?
Whatever is true, I know I want to avoid the bitterness and fear at war with me. This morning I read from Paul’s letter to the Philippians: “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” A fine sentiment and worthy advice, but difficult for one who sometimes feels forgotten.
And yet, whatever good is in me need not be remembered, only the God who is the source and center of that good. So I have no need of resolutions, only to be resolute.